


And Only Bystanders Remain

by RenaLanfordGirl (LadyArrowhead)



Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: Bonding, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-19
Updated: 2013-12-19
Packaged: 2018-01-05 05:08:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1089965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyArrowhead/pseuds/RenaLanfordGirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kirkwall's streets are empty, the Champion and her companions are gone. Sebastian has chosen not to follow her and remains all by himself in the lonely streets of the city of chains.<br/>At a cold winter night, lost in thought, another one who has chosen to stay in Kirkwall joins him for a brief talk.</p>
            </blockquote>





	And Only Bystanders Remain

**Author's Note:**

  * For [PhD Fan (miryai)](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=PhD+Fan+%28miryai%29).



Kirkwall seemed empty without Hawke. Though Sebastian had sworn to hunt her down, to go back to Starkhaven and gather an army and what had he done instead?

Nothing. Only remaining and resting, trying to figure out if he would actually do it. The thought of her choosing Anders, not only over himself, but over those countless innocents that had not deserved to die, made the fire of anger in his chest grow and burn, his fingers tickle and his throat sore. Like a bleeding wound it did not stop hurting but caused him pain after the incident and did not seem to stop doing so.

He had sought out all those places that had once been his little sanctuaries - the homes of his companions. Merrill's house had been abandoned, the shards of that magic mirror of hers lying on the floor. The plants had begun to wither already so Sebastian had begun to water them again. Merrill wouldn't have let them die like that.

Afterwards he had sought out the Barrack's of the guards. Donnic had already left days ago, following his wife who had left with Hawke as well - sisters, the Champion had once told him, Aveline and Carver were the only family she still had. So when Hawke left so did Aveline and Donnic.

The city guard had still remained stable while the rest of Kirkwall seemed to collapse after the Champion had left. Aveline had trained her recruits well. There wasn't anything he could take care of, forcing him yet again to wander the empty streets.

Isabela's room at the Hanged Man was already taken by someone else but he still found traces of the lady pirate. Like little cuts within the wall, he knew, she would do when she was bored. Little pieces of paper, so-called friend fiction she exchanged with Varric - and Sebastian collected and kept those parts with him.

Varric's room was still empty and silent. Silence was not what had been part of the dwarf, Varric was always songs and smiles and stories. The owner of the Hanged Man and Norah had not dared to rent out this room again. He was allowed to enter it, watching the fire burning in the chimney. It was strange but Varric, like Aveline, hadn't left a single trail of himself, almost as if he had expected to leave right away. From what he knew about the dwarf, Sebastian would not even be surprised if that was the case.

Wherever he went loneliness followed. He did not enter Fenris' mansion but was just sitting on the steps sometimes, watching the nobles pass by that, despite Kirkwall's state already seemed only to think about themselves and playing their own games.

The chantry was still just rubble and instead of getting build up again the rest of Kirkwall had followed, slowly breaking apart as a chain that had lost it's main link.

"It does not surprise me to find you here. You are still avoiding the Champion's Estate. This is the only place where you could be."

Sebastian did not need to look up to find out who was talking to him. There was another one who had been tied to the Champion and was abandoned now, someone like him, left all by himself.

"Knight-Captain Cullen.", he stated, forcing a smile at the blond man with tired eyes. Cullen seemed surprisingly more focused than Sebastian felt about himself. While Sebastian felt like still living in an illusion of a demon, hoping to awake any moment and to find Elthina back alive and Hawke by his side, Cullen's eyes seemed exhausted but yet aware of the situation.

"After the emotional reaction you've had in front of the Champion I  was convinced  you'd have left the city and gone to Starkhaven right away.", the Knight Commander sat down beside him, following Sebastian's gaze with his eyes. He was looking for whatever the Prince of Starkhaven was watching but after a while realized that he had just been staring into the void.

"But then I heard rumours about you", the templar continued, "You, taking care of others and wandering the steps you usually used to take with the Champion, all on your own."

"So what?", Sebastian asked, still gazing at the houses in front of him. He noticed the faint smell of fire and dust which was weird as the days were beginning to get colder. Cold smelled like iron and blood and made every move even a bit more painful, but it never smelled like dust. "I'm not doing anyone harm."

"No, you're not." Silence returned and placed herself between the two men, her presence growing stronger with every breath they took. Sebastian did not like it. When he was doing something he could turn his thoughts away, when he was walking their paths he could just think back and remember. _Try to forget._

Silence made it worse. She was a good listener, without any judgement, but she did not reply. So talking might be better, he thought.

"It is better than doing nothing even if it is not much. If we just do the greatest we can, and may it be so little as following a friend's steps, we an improve this world a bit more. And Kirkwall? Kirkwall just needs every improvement it can get.", his voice was a bit raspy, without the usual calmness it had about it. Maybe it was because he slowly started to loose trust in these words himself.

A bitter chuckle escaped the Knight-Captain's throat. "You truly sound like a prince. I never thought I would come across someone like that again, a third time in life. And yet here you are, though your eyes are showing how tired you are."  
  
"A third time?"

Cullen sighed, "Yes. Someone who wants to help no matter what. Like Surana or Hawke."

"I'm not like Hawke.", Sebastian replied, a strange fondness even now following her name, "She would not show any sign of exhaustion, not in public or anywhere. She would just smile and make one of her horrible jokes."

"But Hawke's gone.", Cullen ended, looking up at the night sky, "The Champion vanishes after the greatest danger of all times has been defeated. Sounds familiar, doesn't it?" For a moment he felt like he was about to laugh, that once again people others cared about just vanished and never seemed to return just felt funny in a way. Yet then a bitter taste filled his mouth, a slight unwell feeling in his stomach and a strong kind of pain in his chest, similar to the stab of a sword. The feeling of loneliness, crushing on his shoulders with a weight he had to carry constantly.

"It is what heroes do.", the priest whispered, knowing about the Warden's disappearance, following the templar's gaze, "When the story is finished they leave. And only bystanders, secondary characters you could say, remain.  We might as well be looking at the same sky as them now and still don't realize it. The only thing we have in common is the Maker's guidance, his watchful eye and his love for us."  
  
"The chantry is gone, now, however."

Cullen could not bear to look at the sky any longer, ashamed of what kind of turn this conversation had taken. He had come here to speak to Sebastian, to make sure he was okay. He had been the one entering focused, wanting to help but now he was loosing himself in pain and the words the chantry brother said to cheer him up were met with cold facts of truth.

"Meredith is dead, so is Elthina and the chantry itself lies in ruins.", the Knight-Captain got up, his brown eyes shining almost desperate, his voice starting to shake,  Kirkwall's without a Viscount, without a Champion. It is..."

" _Empty_.", Sebastian finished, "What remains are silhouettes of the people we know, shadows and trails. And us bystanders don't know what we should do by now.

That's why I'm following and taking care. So I don't have to see the emptiness, don't have to think if I actually go to Starkhaven or not.

For now I can be of a use without doing anything wrong."

Cullen felt as if his throat was getting thicker, the words escaped his lips slower than usual, "I'm doing the same. Kirkwall needs someone to look out for it - no one else seems to do so than the few of us that remained. That's why I came looking for you. I know how it is like to loose someone you care about..."

"So you were worried about me?", the smile on the chantry prince's lips was weak but way more relieved, "Why that? Hawke supported the mages and I supported Hawke."

Cullen sighed, admitting the connection he felt the two of them had was heart and felt like reliving everything again, like seeing Meredith turn once again to stone, the chantry exploding, the Qunari's Invasion, the demons haunting the Calenhad Circle and forming Surana's smile.

"Both of us saw Kirkwall fall.", he began, his voice sounding like a melancholic melody - coming right from the heart, "We both serve the Maker. We both lost someone who is very dear to us and both of us in the end turned to bystanders remaining after the great heroes disappeared from the stage - loosing an idol and a friend in one blink. And yet here we are, and instead of wallowing in self-pity we help." He swallowed heavily, ignoring the urge to clear his throat,

"We help because that's how we can keep our mind busy. Without it we would give into our anger and confusion without thinking and believe me, I have been there. I'm proud that you are taking your time after that...outburst of you. That's why you reminded me of Hawke. She never did something without thinking as well."

Sebastian hadn't said a word, his smile hadn't vanished but instead reached his blue eyes. He was silent, watching Cullen for a moment, before he mouthed an almost silent "Thank you."

"You don't need to thank me. I'm pathetic in a way. Here I come to cheer you up and in the end it is you saying the words. Might be the priest in you. I've never been a man of words myself."

Sebastian smirked at him, his eyes losing a bit of the wary look, "I might be able to use a lot of words but what counts is the thought. You meant well."

Cullen shrugged helplessly, scratching his blonde curls in a confused gesture, not sure what to do with his hands otherwise.

"Maybe the Maker wanted us to meet on purpose in a situation as dark as this one. In a city without heroes...", Sebastian got up, walking graceful steps to Cullen's side. Gently he placed a hand on the Knight-Commander's shoulder. The words escaped his mouth faster than thoughts would spring from his head and even if Cullen did not recognize it, Sebastian had needed to hear Cullen's words. They had helped him to make up his mind., "Because the city needs new ones. So let us stop being merely bystanders, followers, and act without the lead of someone else.

Together."

Their smiles got warmer, even if snow began to fall from the sky. As soon as the snow flakes touched their cheeks they would melt and run down like tears. But none of them felt the emptiness they had felt before.

Because at this very moment they had found a path they could walk on. Together, it seemed.

No more empty breaths for each of them it seemed.

They felt a bit more whole again.

 

"Together it is."


End file.
